INJURY TIMES

VIP AND VVIP

After all the fuss kicked up about beer, ahem sorry, Budweiser, not being sold inside of World Cup venues in Qatar, it’s very strange just how prevalent booze is at the tournament. As long as you’re well connected (a friend of a Fifa executive or a sponsor), because then, as the New York Times reported, you have access to free Champagne, Scotch, gin, whiskey, wine and other drinks. These are of course available to “non-regular fans” in the VIP and VVIP and hospitality areas. “At a $3 000-a-seat (about R52 000) hospitality lounge at Al Bayt Stadium during the USA’s game with England, for instance, the bar menu included Taittinger Champagne, Chivas Regal 12-year-old whisky, Martell VSOP brandy and Jose Cuervo 1800 tequila.” Actually, sounds like a good way to have a "year-end do".

THE POSH SEATS

More from the Times: “In all, there are five tiers of ‘hospitality’ in the stadiums, according to Match Hospitality, a Fifa partner that operates those sections, beginning with $950 (about R16 600) stadium seats that serve street-style food, along with wine and beer. At the highest end are private suites that cost about $5 000 (R87 600) per person and offer six-course meals prepared by a private chef, cocktails served by sommeliers and mixologists, and the promise of ‘guest appearances’ by unnamed celebrities.”

THE EVEN POSHER SEATS

But wait, there’s more, because of course there is “the most exclusive suite”, which, according to the NY Times, “is the Pearl Lounge, right above the halfway line at Lusail Stadium, which offers each guest an ‘exceptional commemorative gift’. There is also, according to someone who has been in it, a suite at Al Bayt that, for some reason, boasts a retractable bed and a bathroom equipped with a shower.” So Messi scores the winning goal and you can go and cool yourself off in the shower, sounds alright.

THE NATIONAL DRINK OF GHANA

Speaking about drinks, heard the one about Ghana’s new national beverage of choice? A pint of Luis Suarez’s tears.

‘DON’T FOUL!’

One of the more bizarre periods – on the field – in this World Cup came during Poland’s last group match with Argentina. It looked as if the outcome of the group was going to be decided by yellow cards conceded – Mexico, who were winning their match against Saudi Arabia, had picked up two more yellow cards than the Polish – which led to the incredible situation of Poland’s coaching staff shouting at their players on the field. “They were shouting at us from the bench: ‘Don’t concede. Don’t get cards’,” Piotr Zielinsk said afterwards. He was able to laugh by that point. “Strange,” the Poland midfielder called it.

‘JUSTICE FOR JL’

You’ve heard that Australia is a nanny state? Well further proof was provided in the first Test between the West Indies and Pat Cummins’ side in Perth, where security removed a banner reading “Justice for JL”. For those not in the know, "JL" is Justin Langer, who hails from Perth and has expressed some strong views about some of the current Australia players, whom he coached in the national team recently. Freedom of speech aside, there’s also barely anyone in the stadium watching the match, so it’s not as if the banner was blocking anyone’s view.

‘A FEW TOO MANY BEERS’

Cameron Smith at the Australian Open: “I was pretty quick to the pub (after Friday) and, yeah, and was probably a few too many beers deep and then I realised we had an early tee time.” Cheers.